could you imagine?

Could you imagine a life in which you never knew where you would sleep each night?

One in which you almost wished you were still in jail or on parole, 

because then you at least had people checking up on you?  

Because then at least you weren't alone?

Or one in which people would take one look at you
and cross the street
rather then to walk by you?

A life in which you said "Be safe" when you were 

parting with someone rather than saying 

"See you tomorrow", "Have a great evening" and the like?

Before this past Saturday,

I couldn't have really imagined it either.

..................................

As I stood in the dining room of homeless shelter in a neighboring city, the thought that if Jesus were here today, I could picture Him standing in that room and talking with these people just would not leave me.  Oh, may we walk ever and always with a heart of love towards our God, that we might have eyes to see those that He sees and to love those He loves.

"Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me."
Matthew 25:40

a table for nine

Since the summer, we have had the joy of sharing the campus with an extraordinary family.  In the eyes of the world, there truly is nothing ordinary about them.  A young single woman who has adopted seven children and in the process of adopting more.  Oh, here is something so powerful to watch someone surrender all, to joyous give all to Jesus.  To be used by Him in ways unimaginable.  Below is a story written by one of Heather's young daughters.  I remember hearing her read it herself over the summer.  And to this day, I'm not sure if there is something that else that I could point to so definitely as life-changing as that morning when I heard those women share.  May we be a people who always have a 'yes' upon our lips to what the Lord is calling us to do.

 a table for nine

I will never forget the day I first came to my adoptive family. My mother told us she was taking us to a fancy restaurant for a “family night.” I remember walking into this classy restaurant and hearing my mother say,"A TABLE FOR NINE" please. I was a bit confused because I counted and there was only seven adopted kids plus one single momma. I had heard my new mom was a bit eccentric, so I just thought this was one of her moments. Shouldn't we of gotten a table for eight I thought to myself? I recounted all of us and was just confused. As we all sat down, my mom saved a place for someone right next to her. I began looking around wondering who in the world was meeting us for dinner. Who was joining us for "Our Family Night?" At the time I was too scared to even talk, so I just sat there curiously wondering and expecting someone to join us for dinner. My mother began to order and smile and carry on as if nothing was wrong. She began to seriously get on my nerves, and then I couldn't take it anymore. I had to find out who she was saving the seat for.

I will never forget the words that came out of her mouth. "Kids, I want to introduce you to your father." "I have invited him to dinner with us tonight, and would like to tell you all about him." I was shocked. I thought that my new adopted mother was single!? I quickly glance back at the door expecting a man to walk in. I was stunned, as my mother began to talk about a man who would never leave us or forsake us. She talked about His heart and who His character was. She began to describe how he saved her life, and began to tell us all about him. She said she would like to introduce Him to us. I will never forget that moment. The tears just fell from my eyes. I had become so numb and this was the first time I could even feel again. As she began to describe who He was, I felt as if I had already met him. It was a familiar feeling. I can't describe it, but there were many and I mean many nights where I lay bleeding and in pain where I felt His presence. I wanted to die so the pain would stop. When I say pain I mean severe pain. My body was used as a chopping block or a cutting board. I not only felt physical pain as my biological parents would do horrors to me, but I felt such deep heart pain. There were many nights I felt as if someone was carrying me, keeping me warm, and whispering into my ear words of hope. I then realized as my mother began to describe this person who she saved a seat for and claimed to be my father, it was the same person who held me, wiped my tears, and mended my open wounds. That night in a restaurant in Tulsa, Oklahoma I met a man that has forever changed my life.

This man has truly healed me. He is my father and my Doctor. With tears I accepted Jesus into my heart that night. I will never forget the evening when God came to dinner with us, and I officially met him. I will never forget the prayer and tears streaming down my newly adoptive mother's face as she introduced us to the man that had once healed her as well. I will never forget the embrace I got, I never wanted my mom to let go. I didn't just feel her arms around me but God's arms. When she prayed over me and cried over me I promise you this, I saw my father God in her eyes. I didn’t just get adopted by a new family, I got adopted by a father who knows how many hairs are upon my head.

To think that I was once the abused child whose story was plastered all over national television. I will never forget the day my caseworker told my mom not to adopt me because I was too old, too much work, and too sick. I will never forget turning on the news and hearing the reporter say that I had one of the most severe cases of sexual abuse she had ever heard of where the child actually lived. I remember listening to my teacher as she told my mom I was considered mentally retarded because I couldn’t read or write at age eleven. I remember listening to my foster parents whisper about how “homely” looking I was and how messed up my body and teeth are. I remember at school how my peers would tell me they weren’t allowed to play with me because they were afraid to catch some disease or that I would hurt them. I write this to say that God still performs signs, wonders, and miracles. I am now a daughter of a King. I was once lost but now I am found. I was ashes turned into beauty. I was once damaged and broken and now restored and whole. God is reaching His hands out to you today. He has seen your tears, he has cried with you. Let him heal and restore you today. I will never forget the day when my mom said the words, “ A table for nine,” please.

adoption.

Do you know the feeling when what you are trying to communicate is too big for words?  When you are worried that in your stumbling and faltering, something indescribable will become cheapened or lessened?  This season has been one of the Lord so beautifully and perfectly deepening my understanding of the Gospel and though it seems hard, I'm going to try to jot down some thoughts.

Wednesday evening a group of us were able to go to the airport to welcome five children from Ethiopia and a little boy from Haiti.  The Ethiopians had just travelled half way around the world to be part of an international children's choir; the Haitian boy had just been picked up by his forever family and on his way home.  

I remember walking in the airport and first seeing the cheerful circle of orange, as the children and staff of the choir were gathered together.  We walked up, greeting our friends who are on staff with the ministry.  The children were tired - exhausted - after 20 hours of traveling.  They were wearing their matching orange t-shirts and holding onto balloons.  

Reaching out, I snagged the ribbon on one of the little boy's balloons, causing the bright balloon to bob up and down.  His face looked up at mine and a smile lit up his face and eyes.  And right then, something happened in my heart.  

We had such fun - each of us talking in our own language - playing with the balloons.  Up and down, watching the static electricity.  And somehow, I'm still not sure how, they stole a part of my heart and I'm pretty convinced that things will never be entirely the same.  

 

Then we all gathered at the meeting place, for word had passed that the one that we had been waiting for was about to arrive.  How amazing it was to stand there, realizing that the little boy that we have been praying for by name for the past two years, was about to walk there in front of us - to be here.

The elevator doors opened and the newly united family walked out; a Dad, a Mum, a baby sister and a little boy.  And it was then that the Lord showed me a little of the beauty of the miracle of adoption in the Gospel.

How often do we say the words "We are adopted as sons and daughters of the King"?  Yet we say it casually and move on. . .do we really grasp what that means?

Adoption is not just an idealistic concept, or an idea that sounds socially pleasing.  It is a legal and binding decision - a covenant in a sense perhaps - for a lifetime.  It means you take a new name, a new place.  It means that you belong to someone.

This little boy, standing there holding onto his new Dad's hand, had no right or merit of his own that he should be standing there.  Yet he was - and with more rights in this country of the United States of America than this girl does!  All because he was adopted as a son.  

And to think of our rejoicing, the forty or so people from the school and church, when they walked through the doors.  In the same way, what rejoicing there must be in heaven when the Lord presents His sons and daughters.  Oh, how absolutely incomprehensible!

In the next little bit, we are so blessed to be either praying for the adoptions of close friends in our midst or celebrating the arrival of new lives into families.  And we have the joy of having the Ethiopian children right on campus with us. . .as I walked by their dorm this morning I could hear them practicing their songs.  May the Lord continue to reveal His heart and nature in and through all of these circumstances and people.

{scotland} part one

a story in pictures. . .

Over the summer, the Lord opened up the way for a friend and I to spend two weeks in Scotland this fall.  It was an absolutely beautiful time in ways that words can never fully communicate.  The Lord has truly hallmarked this little country in my life and it was such a blessing to go on this trip with a friend who is so surrendered to the Him.  And now, let us end the words and continue with this story in pictures. . .  

so this girl got a plane

and hopped the pond.

and she met her friend

and then they got on a bus

(they rode a lot of buses) 

and then a train

and then a ferry

and ended up on an island.

the isle of eigg in the western Hebrides 

there were many cups of tea

and tramps about and across the island

and walks down by the ocean.

the sheep didn't like us much.

yes, they all lined up and charged at us.  typical sheep behaviour? I think not. 

there was a time to share of Christ and testify to His exceeding greatness, glory and worth.

 ^"But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light."

1 Peter 2:9

And then it was time to travel onward. . .

fall leaves and a quote

a quick snapshot of a local church. . .look at all the lovely leaves and the red door

"A man is what he is on his knees before God, and nothing more."

Robert Murray M'Cheyne